Helen's Albums Of The Decade

In response to NME's rather unimaginative and questionable 'Albums of the Decade' list, Helen Of Troy... decided the only thing to do was to put on our proverbial thinking caps and come up with our own lady-led version.

Doing the list was all kinds of fun, but it also made us feel really freakin' old!

So here, in alphabetical, rather than rank, order, is our top 20 lady albums of the naughties.

Bat For Lashes – Fur And Gold

Britney Spears – Blackout

CSS – Cansei De Ser Sexy

Feist – The Reminder

Florence And The Machine – Lungs

Girls Aloud – Chemistry

Gossip – Standing In The Way Of Control

Gwen Stefani – Love, Angel, Music, Baby

Kelis – Kaleidoscope

M.I.A.- Arular

M.I.A. - Kala

Madonna - Music

Patti Smith – Trampin’

PJ Harvey – Stories From The City, Stories From The Sea

PJ Harvey - White Chalk

Roisin Murphy – Ruby Blue

Sleater Kinney - The Woods

The Long Blondes – Someone To Drive You Home

Yeah Yeah Yeahs – Fever To Tell

Yelle – Pop Up

Did we miss anyone off?

What Helen Of Troy... Has Learnt This Week

1. We've really missed the Yeah Yeah Yeahs.

While the last few years have been filled with myriad musical treats, few artists have come along who combine style and substance as effortlessly as Karen O and co. It was with great pleasure and excitement, then, that we learnt the new Yeah Yeah Yeahs album, It's Blitz!, is scheduled for release on April 13th, with the album's first single, Zero, available for download/purchase on April 6th. It's been three years since the trio released the magnificent Show Your Bones, so we're chomping at the bit to hear their latest long player. Woot.

2. A woman performing at The Grammys on her due date should be treated as more than just a glorified backing singer.

When Helen Of Troy... heard that M.I.A. was still going to perform at the Grammys, despite being ready to drop-sprog that very day, we fell even more in love with our favourite innovative agitator. Unfortunately, while we were hoping to see Ms Arulpragasam perform Paper Planes in all it's world-beating glory, what we actually got was M.I.A. performing for seconds before she was joined onstage by Kanye West, Jay-Z, T.I. and Lil Wayne. While Maya was her usual awesome self, and more than held her own amongst these hip-hop heavyweights, we couldn't help but feel a little short-changed. Have a little look at the video below and let us know what y'all think.

M.I.A. Grammy Performance

3. Some collaborations are just too weird.

Christina Aguilera's 2008 come-back Keeps Gettin' Better was vastly overshadowed by Britney's Womanizer, while her new look was criticized for being a bit too similar to Lady GaGa. It seems XTina is taking no chances with her next project, as she's enlisted the help of Goldfrapp, Sia Furler and Ladytron. Yep that's right, Ladytron! An inspired choice or a desperate grab at underground cool? Only time will tell.

4. That which we call a rose. By any other name would smell as sweet. Santogold has changed her name to Santigold. Fact.

New M.I.A. And Santogold!

Get It Up! - M.I.A. and Santogold's first collaboration - blew us away last year, and we've been hoping ever since that another work was in the post. Fortunately, it was. The pair's second offering comes via N.A.S.A., which is a kind of ongoing creative project formed by Sam Spiegel and Ze Gonzales. The track is called Whachadoin and can be downloaded via the link below. Let us know your thoughts.

N.A.S.A - Whachadoin (featuring M.I.A. & Santogold)

Which Pop Princess Will Usurp The Queen?

Magic Madge, the Queen of pop, has spent the last few decades at the top of the popular music tree. But as the clocks wind on, the years fade by and leotard manufacturers become increasingly reticent to clothe Ms Ciccone, the question ascends. As Madonna becomes the Queen Mother of pop, who will become Queen?

If you'd asked that question to early noughties pop fans, they would have probably rattled off a list of potential candidates, including Britney, Christina and P!nk. But in the intervening years the madness, plagiarism, madness, fake tan, madness and generally being shit have all gotten in the way a little. These days it seems like Sarah Palin might be a better candidate!

The thing is that Madonna hasn't simply been musically significant (which she certainly has), but also culturally, sartorially and inspirationally. Like her or not, it's difficult to argue against the fact that she has pushed boundaries artistically, commercially (Pepsi wanted their money back!), and sexually (the D.H. Lawrence picture book). Are there any contemporary Fempops who can hold a candle to her?

Maybe there's Beyonce? Getting the obvious stuff out of the way; she's been phenomenally successful, both in Destiny's Child and as a solo artist. Her music has pretty wide appeal and few could argue with the brilliance of Bills, Bills, Bills and Crazy In Love. At the moment, though, she seems to be playing it extremely safe. The concept for I Am... Sacha Fierce is clever, but the songs are lacking in sass. Did the independent woman up and leave as soon as Jay-Z put a ring on her finger?

What about Gwen then? Stefani's first album was a hoot and the lead track, What You Waiting For? is indescribably brilliant. She also has a successful band career and lots of support from some pretty cool peers. Although the last album wasn't quite up to snuff, she has retained the bleeding edge of cool and is definitely a unique force in music (would anyone else have been absurd enough to try Wind It Up?). All this could be for nought, though, as she saddles up with the No Doubt boys once again.

And what of Britney? She may well have collected the fragile pieces of her mind up off the bathroom floor but her music is now verging on the criminally insane (if I was dating a girl who said the word Womanizer anywhere near as much, I'm sure I'd have put cyanide on her cheesy chips some time ago). Has Britney consistently produced the classic tracks that we need from a pop Queen? Baby One More Time or Toxic are pretty good I guess, but she's yet to blow us all away.

It could be anyone of these artists, or none. Maybe I'm looking in the wrong place and it'll be a Lily Allen, an M.I.A. or a Cheryl Cole. Or maybe it's just that the age of the superstar is over. With music available by the track in a hundred different formats, we don't all have to buy the same vinyl or watch the same TOTP any more. If and when the right time and artist comes along, I'm pretty sure Queen Madge will still be in the ring to put the newbie through her paces.

Jordan Stead

Currently listening to...
Alphabeat - Alphabeat
Natalie Imbruglia - White Lilies Island
Cibo Matto - Viva La Woman

Helen Of Troy... Does Audience Participation: Part Deux

As you've probably figured out by now our 'top three favourite...' series is simply a not-so-subtle ploy to get you lovely lot involved with the blog. We wanna hear more of what you've got to say, even if it's to tell us we’re wrong, deaf or illiterate even! This is very much an open forum and your comments are always welcome.

Anyway, on with the show. A couple of weeks ago we announced our top three favourite pop acts of all time, and this week we're moving onto our highly-coveted (ahem) electro section.

So after a little rumination we've decided on the following as our top three favourite electro artists of all time…

1. Bjork
The extraordinary elfin-like songstress is more than worthy of our top spot, not least for being such an intriguing and fantastic visionary. She's released six studio albums to date, each one different, each one groundbreaking and each one absolutely amazing. Her music might not always be easy to listen to, but she's almost always light years ahead of her contemporaries. Bjork, we salute you.

2. M.I.A.
She may have only released two albums to date, but the forward-thinking electro-clash political grime princess has made quite an impact over the past few years. Cherry-picking elements from various genres and cultures, she produces intelligent socially provocative songs that remain opinionated whilst never bordering on preachy. All this is then offset by a host of cruder, fun-as-fuck offerings – just the way we like it!

3. Peaches
A former elementary school teacher who makes mucky rock'n'roll-tinged electro-punk, exploring issues of sexual identity and gender roles. What’s not to love there? Live, she's a-fucking-mazing, performing with the kind of attitude most artists could only ever dream of. All together now... shake your dicks, shake your tits!

Now it’s over to you. Who are your top three?

Hip-hop-hooray!

While Helen Of... spends most evenings reading wordy, worthy tomes, we're not averse to a little trash every once in a while. That's why we'll be heading down to our friendly local book shop this week to purchase Let's Talk About Pep, the autobiography of Salt-N-Pepa's Sandra Denton. The book tells of Pepa's life, from her childhood in Jamaica to her time with the ever-fabulous rap group. If Amazon's sample excerpt, about Denton's love for lizards, is anything to go by, this book is going to immense...

One day I remember I got ahold of a machete. I was only like five years old. Don't ask me how I got it or where I got it from, but I had this machete and a bucket. I went around the farm looking for lizards or chameleons. They had all kinds of creatures on this farm, but there were a lot of chameleons. I was fascinated by them, watching them go to a green plant and turn green, then to the ground and turn brown. I walked around looking for them, and I would chop them in half and throw them into my bucket.

By the end of the day, I had a bucket full of chopped-up lizards. My sister came out and saw what I was doing and she scared the hell out of me. "What is that you're doing?!" she screamed. "Dem lizards gwon ride ya." She was telling me that the lizards were going to haunt me. That my doing that had unleashed some kind of curse. "Dem gwon ride ya!" my sister kept saying in her Jamaican patois. Well, they did ride me. As I got older, a lot of my friends would tell me, "You're such a chameleon." It was true. I was real good at blending in. I was good at taking on whatever was around me. If I hung out with thugs, I would be a thug. If I hung out with a prince, it was nothing for me to become royalty. My ability to fit in has been a blessing, but also a curse.

...wowzer.

Anyhoo, it's been eight years since the mighty Salt-N-Pepa split (they've got a reality TV show and Salt is releasing a solo album, but there's no new S-N-P material to date). This got us thinking about the state of lady-led hip hop in 2008. We're happy to report it's really rather healthy. Here are a few of our current favourites...

Rye Rye - Brilliant bubblegum hip hop from M.I.A.'s protegee. Check out Wassup Wassup and Shake It To The Ground - www.myspace.com/tharealryerye

Kid Sister - Smart rhymes over poppy beats from the Chicago-based rapper. Check out current single Pro Nails (feat. Kanye West) - www.myspace.com/kidsister

Yo Majesty - Party electro hip-hop duo, known for their explosive live performances. Check out Club Action - www.myspace.com/yomajesty4life

Bunny Rabbit - Brooklyn-based one-woman experimental rap whirlwind, backed by her brilliant producer Black Cracker. Check out Hit Em Up and It Ain't Easy - www.myspace.com/loversandcrypts

Ooh, and Missy's releasing her new album Block Party in September, which will be reviewed on ...Countertop Writings once we've had a listen.